☀ Wednesday, December 09, 2009 (12:03 AM)
You'll never change~
Hey you.
Yes I'm sure. I'm really sure...
But it's sad to know that one sentence I fibbed, I lost your trust completely.
My heart simply fell deep because nomatter how many times I try to explain things, I can still see that you still don't get it.
I don't even know if you even try to understand me.
Or respect my decisions.
Because I respect yours.
I never tried stopping you.
Maybe I should have.
But it really hurts to see how you can be self-centered.
It constantly reminds me of why I'm not with you.
Why I made that decision.
Why do you keep saying that my mindset has always been the same which is why all of this has happened?
You're blaming ME.
My fault.. I know and I can accept that.
If you judge me lik that, I can say the same thing about you.
I've opened up soo many times and I've told you EVERYTHING.
What more do you need from me?
Age will never be a limit. Not because my mindset is the same.
I've seen more than you think I have.
I'm smarter than you think I am.
I've thought soo much more than how it seems.
And I never say "I know more because I've been in more relationships than you"..
Because I don't stereotype.
I always think that "
every day would be a different day."You know what hurts the most? Reading this:
"It is always when times are bad when you seek for help, but when you're relaxed
and enjoying yourself, you'll never think of the bad times you had and how
panicked you were.."
"Some things come just too easily and that's when you won't
know how much others treasure it.....I guess it came too easily for you...that's
why things ended up this way....."
Can I say my view now?
Doesn't everybody need help when things are bad and they can't fix it themselves? Why should I ponder upon the bad things that has happened when there's always better days. All I can do from the bad things is to learn from it. A bad memory is not a memory to remember. And when I'm happy, I'm happy with you. When I'm sad, I trusted you.
I'm not sure anymore.Things don't come too easily to me. I don't ask for it to happen. I don't ask for it to be given to me. I didn't think that how things ended up is as bad as you make it seem. Nomatter how much you treasure it. I'm implicating that you're telling me I'm using you.. I'm not and whatever happens, happens for a reason.
I know I hurt you soo bad and I know I lied to you but I will always tell the truth in the end.
Like you said.. Some things are better said than done. Very true. But I know when I'm in the wrong. I know when I should tell you the truth; in which I did. And yet....
I'm just not sure anymore.When will you stop assuming me and start trying to understand me?I'm not going to say how I feel anymore and mean it because I know how it would never be heard. I have a heart too... I guess I'll just keep questioning the answers until the answers are in my questions.
Nothing happened today because I purposely made nothing happen. (only you know what I mean). I was checking to see if..
You like me for who I really am deep inside...
Or for what I've done TO you and for you...
The certainty's gone.
I'm just not sure anymore.Help, I'm alive..My heart keeps beating like a hammer..Labels: You hear but not listen.
"Oh Bother"
